300+ Monday Puns & Jokes for 2025

You’re looking for a way to shake off the Monday blues, and jokes might be the answer. You’ll find that Monday jokes often rely on relatable scenarios and wordplay to bring some humor to your day. As you start your week, you’re probably wondering what kinds of jokes will help you laugh away your morning grogginess, and that’s exactly what you’ll discover next.

Best Monday Puns & Jokes (2025)

Mondays can be tough, but a dose of humor can help kick-start the week on a lighter note. With a collection of puns and jokes tailored specifically for Mondays, this list aims to bring a smile to your face and make the beginning of the week a little more bearable.

• Why did the Monday morning coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
• What did the Monday say to the Tuesday? “You’re a day late.”
• Why do Mondays have a bad reputation? They’re always a looming threat.
• On Mondays, my favorite exercise is running away from my responsibilities.
• Why do eggs hate Mondays? They crack under the pressure.
• Monday motivation is like a superstition; some believe in it, others don’t.
• What do you call a bear that loves Mondays? A grizzly optimist.
• Why did Monday go to therapy? It had an existential crisis.
• On Mondays, I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode.
• Why did the alarm clock go to therapy on Monday? It was feeling a little wound up.
• Monday is like that one friend who always shows up uninvited but makes the party interesting anyway.
• What did the Monday say when it ran into its ex, Sunday? “You’re always so laid back.”
• Mondays are the only day of the week that understands the power of a good procrastination technique.
• Why did the Monday join a band? It was a natural rhythm.
• I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why Monday is the worst, and I’m right.
• Monday blues are just a myth perpetuated by people who don’t like responsibility.
• What do you call a Monday that’s full of excitement and positive energy? A mirage.
• Monday is to the week what broccoli is to the vegetable garden; necessary but not necessarily liked.
• If Monday were a food, it would be a stale cracker; necessary for sustenance but lacking flavor.
• Why did the computer go to sleep on Monday? It had a virus and needed an update.
• Monday is the quiet, mysterious cousin of the weekend; nobody really knows what it’s thinking.
• What does Monday have in common with a sculptor? Both shape the week.
• Monday morning sunshine is like a cruel joke; it’s bright but doesn’t necessarily bring joy.
• Why did the employee bring a ladder to work on Monday? He wanted to reach his full potential.
• Mondays are the reason God created coffee and Chanel No. 5.

Funny Monday One-Liners & Wordplay

Mondays are often considered the most dreaded day of the week, but with a dash of humor, they can become more bearable. This collection of funny Monday one-liners and wordplay is designed to kick-start your week with a smile.

• Why did Monday morning feel like a bad joke? Because it was a punchline to a long weekend.
• Mondays are like coffee – they can be bitter, but they help you wake up.
• I’m not lazy on Mondays, I’m just on energy-saving mode.
• What did the alarm clock say to Monday morning? “You’re always ticking me off.”
• Monday motivation is like a superpower – it’s rare, but it can move mountains.
• Why do Mondays feel like a marathon? Because you have to run from your responsibilities.
• The best way to survive Mondays is to have a paws-itive attitude – just ask your cat.
• Monday blues are like a bad cold – they’re contagious, but a good joke can be the cure.
• If Monday were a food, it would be broccoli – not everyone’s favorite, but it’s good for you.
• I love Mondays – said no one ever, except maybe the coffee industry.
• Monday mornings are like a math problem – you have to solve for motivation.
• Why did the worker bring a ladder to the office on Monday? To reach his full potential.
• Monday is like a puzzle – it’s hard to figure out, but the solution is always a good laugh.
• I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why Mondays are the worst – there’s a difference.
• The best Monday joke is the one that’s so bad, it’s good – like a dad joke.
• Monday motivation is like a muscle – it needs to be exercised regularly.
• If Monday were a sport, it would be wrestling – you have to grapple with your responsibilities.

Also Read: Stone Mountain Puns & Jokes

• What do you call a group of cows on a Monday? A moo-dy bunch.
• Why did the banana go to the doctor on Monday? He wasn’t peeling well.
• Monday mornings are like a game of chess – you have to make the right moves to win.
• I’m reading a book on anti-gravity – it’s impossible to put down, especially on Mondays.
• Why did the scarecrow win an award on Monday? Because he was outstanding in his field.
• Monday blues are like a song – they can be catchy, but you don’t have to sing along.
• What do you call a bear with no socks on? Barefoot – a common condition on Mondays.
• Mondays are like a recipe – they require a mix of ingredients, including motivation and humor.
• What did the Monday say to the weekend? “See you later, alligator!”
• Why was the calendar sad on Monday? Because it felt like the beginning of the end.
• I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist. I failed.

Best Monday Jokes & Puns for Social Media (2025)

Mondays can be a drag, but they don’t have to be. Starting your week off with a dose of humor can make all the difference.

• Why did Monday morning come to therapy? It had a lot of baggage.
• Monday motivation is like a superpower that only some possess.
• Coffee on Monday isn’t a drink, it’s a lifeline.
• Mondays are like math problems; they add up to stress but can be solved with coffee.
• I’m not lazy on Mondays, I’m just allergic to mornings.
• Why do Mondays feel like the entire weekend decided to leave at once?
• What did the coffee file a police report for on Monday? It got mugged.
• Monday blues are just Tuesday’s whispers.
• Why do Mondays have to start so early? Can’t they just sleep in?
• The best thing about Monday is that it’s not Sunday, which means the weekend is really over.
• Monday is like a blank canvas; you can paint it however you want.
• On Mondays, my brain is 90% caffeine and 10% procrastination.
• Mondays are the perfect day to practice your “I’m a functioning adult” face.
• Why do Mondays always feel like the day after a time jump in a bad movie?
• Monday vibes are all about new beginnings and second chances.
• Did you hear about the Monday that went to the doctor? It had a bad case of the blues.
• The only thing worse than a Monday is a Monday without wifi.
• Monday mornings are like a reboot of your computer; sometimes they work, sometimes they don’t.
• Why did Monday become a baker? It kneaded the dough.
• Monday motivation comes in pills, and they’re called coffee beans.
• Mondays are like the semi-colon in a sentence; they separate the weekend from the rest of the week.
• On Mondays, my coffee and I’ve a symbiotic relationship; it gives me life, and I give it a cup.
• You know what they say about Mondays: they’re like onions, they’ve layers of frustration.
• Why do Mondays and Fridays have a love-hate relationship? Because Mondays are always a little “fried” from the weekend.
• Monday morning quizzes should be a thing to test how awake you are.
• Mondays are the day to remind yourself that every great success story started with a tough Monday.
• What did the Monday say to the weekend? “I’m so over you!”
• Why did the paper take a nap on Monday? It was tired from all the writing.
• I tried to catch some fog yesterday. I mist.

Corny Monday Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Mondays can be tough, but with a dose of humor, the start of the week can become a bit more bearable. Corny Monday jokes are just what you need to kick-start your day with a laugh, helping you shake off the blues and jump into the week with a renewed sense of humor and optimism.

• Why did the coffee file a police report on Monday? It got mugged.
• Monday mornings are like a horror movie – they just keep coming back.
• I’m not lazy on Mondays, I’m just on energy-saving mode.
• What did the Monday say to the coffee? “You’re my only hope.”
• Why do Mondays feel like the first day of school? The dread is real.
• Monday motivation is like a superpower – everyone wants it, but few have it.
• The best Monday joke is the one that helps you forget it’s Monday.
• I love Mondays because I get to hit the snooze button repeatedly.
• Monday blues are just my body’s way of telling me to drink more coffee.
• The only good thing about Monday is that Tuesday is just a day away.
• My Monday routine includes pretending to be a responsible adult.
• On Mondays, my favorite exercise is running late.
• Monday mornings should come with a warning label: May cause excessive yawning.
• If Mondays were a person, they’d be the grumpy old neighbor.
• Monday is the day when my bed and I’ve a long, unbreakable bond.
• The coffee machine is my therapist on Mondays.
• Monday jokes are the best medicine for a case of the Mondays.
• My favorite Monday activity is planning my weekend.
• I’m not a morning person on Mondays; I’m not a morning person, period.
• Monday mornings are the perfect time to practice my “resting face”.
• Who needs coffee when you have Monday motivation – just kidding, I need coffee.
• If Monday were a food, it would be Brussels sprouts – hated by many.
• Monday is my day to wear pajamas and call it a “leisure suit”.
• The best Monday advice I’ve ever received is to take it one cup of coffee at a time.
• On Mondays, my superpower is the ability to function on minimal sleep.
• Monday is like a puzzle, I’m still trying to figure it out.
• Why did the calendar feel so tired on Monday? Because it had a whole week ahead of it.

Also Read: Friday Jokes

• Why did the pencil go to therapy on Monday? Because it felt pointless.
• I told a joke about time travel on Monday… but you would have seen it yesterday.

Clever Monday Jokes for Every Occasion (2025)

Mondays can be tough, but with the right dose of humor, they can become more bearable. This collection of clever Monday jokes is designed to kick-start your week with a smile, providing a diverse range of puns and jokes tailored for every occasion. Whether you’re looking to brighten up your morning coffee break or share laughter with colleagues, there’s something here for everyone.

• Why did Monday morning feel like a zombie apocalypse? Because everyone was dying to get to the weekend again.
• Mondays are so bad, even the calendars hate them – they’re always torn on that day.
• Why do Mondays and coffee have a special bond? Because they both help people perk up.
• What’s the best way to survive a Monday? With a latte patience.
• Monday is like a mathematical problem – it’s always adding up to stress but never multiplying the fun.
• On Mondays, why do people bring ladders to work? They want to reach their full potential.
• Monday mornings are like breakfast – they’re eggs-aggeratedly hard to wake up for.
• Why do Mondays feel like they’re in a relationship with the bed? Because they’re always pulling you back in.
• Why are Mondays so good at hide and seek? Because you can’t find the motivation to look for them.
• What’s a Monday’s favorite sport? Dread-ball.
• Why do Mondays have a magnetic personality? They attract complaints.
• Monday mornings and math tests have something in common: they both make you feel like you’re dealing with problems.
• Why do people love their Monday alarm clocks? Because they’re always ringing in the bad news.
• Monday’s favorite fashion trend is monochrome because it matches everyone’s mood.
• In Monday’s vocabulary, “good” is just a four-letter word for “wishful thinking.”
• On Mondays, the office coffee machine is like a therapist – it listens to all your brew-tal stories.
• Why are Mondays like onions? They make everyone cry.
• What do Mondays and pizzas have in common? Even when they’re bad, they’re still pretty good.
• Monday’s superpower is making even the best of us feel like we’re stuck in a rut.
• Why did Monday decide to go to the gym? To get some core strength for the rest of the week.
• Mondays are like the instructions on a puzzle – they’re the piece that makes the rest of the week make sense.
• What’s a Monday’s favorite dessert? Mellow cream pie, because it’s all about finding calm in chaos.
• Why are Mondays so good at telling jokes? Because they’re always a week ahead of the punchline.
• Why did Monday become a musician? Because it was great at composing blues songs.
• Why did Monday go to the art museum? To see the abstract expressionism exhibit, because it matched its mood.
• Why did the computer have to go to work on Monday? It needed to get its bytes in order!
• What did the Monday say to the therapist? “I have a lot of baggage…the kind that weighs down the whole week.”
• Why did the robot quit his job on Monday? He couldn’t handle the circuit overload.
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo on Monday? Pouch potato.

Hilarious Monday Dad Jokes (2025)

Mondays can be tough, but with a dose of dad humor, they can become slightly more bearable. Get ready for a collection of silly jokes to kickstart your week on a lighter note. Expect a plethora of puns that will make you groan and chuckle, all strictly themed around the idea of hilarious Monday dad jokes.

• Why did Monday morning come with a coffee IV? It was a latte help.
• I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised on a Monday.
• Monday blues aren’t blue, they’re more of a burnt coffee color.
• Why did the scarecrow win an award on Monday? Because he was outstanding in his field of procrastination.
• Monday is like a 690 math problem; it’s all about solving the equation of getting out of bed.
• Why do chicken coops only have two doors? Because if they’d four, they’d be a sedan, especially on a Monday.
• On Monday, I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down, even on the worst of Mondays.
• What do you call a fake noodle on Monday? An impasta, and it’s not a great way to start the week.
• Why did the mushroom get invited to all the Monday parties? Because he’s a fun-gi, and who doesn’t love fungi?
• What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work on Monday? A can’t opener, and it’s a real problem.
• I’m not lazy on Mondays, I’m just on energy-saving mode, like your phone but less efficient.
• Why did the banana go to the doctor on Monday? He wasn’t peeling well, and it wasn’t just a Monday blues thing.
• Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend on Monday? He needed space, and a lot of it, even on a Monday.
• What do you call a group of cows playing instruments on Monday? A moo-sical band, and they’re udderly fantastic.
• Why did the bicycle fall over on Monday? Because it was two-tired, and Mondays are tough.
• Why did the chicken go to the gym on Monday? To get some egg-cellent abs, and a head start on the week.
• What do you call a bear with no socks on Monday? Barefoot, and a bit chilly, even on a warm Monday.
• Why did the kid bring a ladder to school on Monday? He wanted to reach his full potential, and make the most of the week.
• What do you call a fish with no eyes on Monday? A fsh, and it’s having a tough Monday.

Also Read: Wednesday Jokes

• Why did the turkey join the band on Monday? He was a drumstick, and a great addition to the band.
• Why did the orange stop in the middle of the road on Monday? Because it ran out of juice, and Mondays can be draining.
• Why did the kid become a baker on Monday? He kneaded the dough, and a lot of motivation to make it through the week.
• What do you call a dog that does magic tricks on Monday? A labracadabrador, and it’s a Monday miracle.
• Why did the rabbit go to the doctor on Monday? He’d hare-loss, and it was a real concern.
• Why did the cat join a band on Monday? Because it wanted to be the purr-cussionist.
• Why did the egg go to therapy on Monday? It was cracking under the pressure.
• Why was the belt arrested on Monday? It held up a pair of pants!
• What did the paper say to the pencil on Monday? “Write on!”
• What does a painter do on Monday? They get framed!

Monday Jokes & Puns That Will Never Get Old

Mondays are often considered the most dreaded day of the week, but with the right dose of humor, they can become a little more bearable. Monday jokes and puns offer a lighthearted way to kick-start the week, providing a much-needed morale boost to tackle the day ahead.

• Why did Monday morning feel so rough? It had a latte problems.
• Mondays are like cookies – they’re always a little crumby.
• What did the coffee file a police report for on Monday? It got mugged.
• Why was the math book sad on Monday? Because it had too many problems.
• What do you call a bear with no socks on Monday? Barefoot.
• Monday motivation is like a superpower – we all wish we’d it.
• I’m not lazy on Mondays, I’m just on energy-saving mode.
• Why did the chicken go to the doctor on Monday? It had fowl breath.
• Monday blues are just a myth – it’s actually the lack of coffee talking.
• Why was the computer cold on Monday morning? It left its Windows open.
• On Mondays, I’m not waking up early, I’m just going to bed late on Sunday.
• What do you call a group of cows playing instruments on Monday? A moo-sical band.
• Monday is like a puzzle – sometimes you just have to piece it together.
• Why did the baker go to the bank on Monday? He needed dough.
• Why did the scarecrow win an award on Monday? Because he was outstanding in his field.
• I love Mondays – said no one ever, except maybe the coffee machine.
• Monday mornings are tough, but coffee and procrastination can solve anything.
• What did the ocean say to the beach on Monday? Nothing, it just waved.
• Monday is the day to start your diet, and by Tuesday, you can start cheating.
• Why did the banana go to the doctor on Monday? He wasn’t peeling well.
• Why was the Monday so long? It was having a stretch.
• Mondays are 99% coffee and 1% hoping for the best.
• The best thing about Monday is that it’s not Sunday, and you didn’t have to go to work the night before.
• What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work on Monday? A can’t opener.
• Why did the bicycle fall over on Monday? Because it was two-tired.
• Monday is the perfect day to practice your “I’m a functioning adult” face.
• The Monday struggle is real, but so is the bed – and it’s calling your name.
• Why did the clock go to therapy on Monday? It was feeling a little wound up.

Conclusion

You’ve survived Monday jokes – congrats, you’re basically a hero! Now, go tackle the day with a laugh and a spring in your step. Don’t worry, it’s all downhill from here (just kidding, it’s Monday). Share these jokes and spread the laughter – your coworkers will thank you (or not, let’s be real).