710+ Short Halloween Puns, Jokes & One-Liners for Kids (2024)

Mark Trumble

September 25, 2024

Short Halloween Puns, Jokes & One-Liners for Kids ([cy])

Table Of Contents

Halloween is just around the corner, and what better way to get into the spooky spirit than with a treasure trove of jokes and puns? Whether you’re planning a haunted house party or looking to entertain trick-or-treaters, 2024‘s ultimate collection of Halloween puns, jokes & one-liners has you covered.

From groan-worthy dad jokes that will leave you howling with laughter to clever one-liners guaranteed to make even the most frightful ghouls crack a smile, this list has something for everyone. It’s time to dive into a cauldron of humor that blends the spooky with the hilarious.

These puns and jokes aren’t just your average “boo”-ring gags—they are packed with spine-tingling wit and ghostly charm, perfect for raising everyone’s spirits this Halloween season. So, if you’re ready to cackle, scream, and giggle your way through the scariest night of the year, keep reading to unlock a crypt full of laughter!

Spooky Jokes & Puns to Lift Your Spirits This Halloween (2024)

Why did the ghost go into the bar? For the boos!
What do ghosts serve for dessert? I-scream!
Why are graveyards noisy? Because of all the coffin!
How do you make a skeleton laugh? You tickle its funny bone!
What’s a ghost’s favorite candy? Boo-berries!
What did the skeleton bring to the party? His ghoul-friend!
Why was the ghost such a bad comedian? He had no body to laugh with.
Why don’t ghosts lie? You can see right through them!
How does a ghost unlock its house? With a spoo-key.
Why did the skeleton skip the Halloween party? He had no guts.
What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling!
Why did the skeleton go to the barbecue? He loved ribs.
How do you write a ghost’s favorite story? With a ghost-writer.
Why was the ghost so happy? He felt on top of the world!
Why don’t ghosts use elevators? They lift their spirits.
What did one ghost say to another? “Do you believe in people?”

Fa-boo-lous Halloween Puns & Jokes for Trick-or-Treat Fun in 2024

What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house? The living room.
Why did the ghost get lost? He took the wrong graveyard shift.
Why did the witch become a doctor? She had great witch-craft!
What’s a monster’s favorite game? Hide and shriek!
What did the skeleton order at the restaurant? Spare ribs.
Why do skeletons hate the cold? It goes right through them.

Also Read: Superhero Jokes & Puns

Why did the werewolf break up with his girlfriend? She was too much of a beast.
What’s a ghost’s favorite game? Hide and shriek!
Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid they’ll unwind.
What did the skeleton say before eating? “Bone Appétit!”
Why did the vampire bring a pencil to the party? He wanted to draw some blood.
Why did Dracula get kicked out of art class? He kept drawing blood.
What do you call a haunted chicken? A poultry-geist.
Why was the mummy always stressed? He had too many wraps to deal with.

Get Your Fang-tastic Laughs with These Vampire Puns & Jokes in 2024

What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A neck-tarine!
Why don’t vampires use mirrors? They can’t reflect on things.
What did Dracula say when he met his wife? “You’re my blood type!”
Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist? To improve his bite.
Why do vampires love baseball? They like to swing bats.
What’s a vampire’s least favorite food? Steak!
Why was Dracula a great artist? He could always draw blood.
How does a vampire start a letter? “Tomb it may concern…”
What’s a vampire’s favorite drink? Blood orange juice.
Why don’t vampires go on dates? They suck at relationships.
What kind of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music!
How do skeletons call each other? On their tele-bone!
Why did the vampire break up with his girlfriend? She was a pain in the neck.
How do vampires keep busy? By blood-sucking up to people.
Why did the vampire fail his test? He was too blood-drained to study.
What’s Dracula’s favorite holiday? Fangsgiving!
Why don’t vampires eat fast food? They prefer things with more bite.
Why did the vampire get a job? He wanted to make a living.

Witch Puns That Will Cast a Spell on Your Fear

Why don’t witches wear hats? They prefer to be spell-binding.
What’s a witch’s favorite subject? Spelling.
Why did the witch go to the party? She wanted to have a ghoul time.
What does a witch use for math? A cauldron-culator.
How do witches keep their hair looking great? With scare-spray.
Why don’t witches play baseball? They’re afraid of flying off the broom.
What does a witch order at a bar? A brew-ski.
Why don’t witches wear makeup? It hides their brew-tiful looks!
What’s a witch’s favorite game? Hex and Seek.
What do you call two witches who share a room? Broom-mates.
Why did the witch bring a ladder to the party? To raise the spirits.
How does a witch fix her broken broom? With witch tape.
What do witches put in their hair? Scare-gel.
What’s a witch’s favorite dessert? Spell-ted caramel!
Why do witches ride brooms? Because vacuum cleaners are too modern.

Skeleton Jokes to Tickling Your Funny Bone

Why don’t skeletons fight? They don’t have the guts.
What did the skeleton say when he was asked to dance? “I’ve got rhythm in my bones!”
Why don’t skeletons play music? They don’t have enough organs.
How do skeletons send mail? Via the bony express.
Why was the skeleton afraid of the storm? He didn’t have the backbone to face it.
Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? He had no body to go with.
How do skeletons relax? By doing yoga, it’s good for their bones.
What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? A trom-bone.
How did the skeleton know it was going to rain? He could feel it in his bones.
Why did the skeleton refuse to get a pet? He didn’t have the guts to care for it.
What did the skeleton bring to the barbecue? Spare ribs!
Why was the skeleton a bad liar? You could see right through him.
What did the skeleton say to his crush? “Bone-jour!”
How does a skeleton take his coffee? Black, no bones about it.
Why don’t skeletons tell scary stories? They don’t have the nerve.
What does a skeleton order at the bakery? A scone!
What’s a witch’s favorite party game? Spin the cauldron!

Ghost One-Liner Jokes That Will Leave You Screaming with Laughter in 2024

Why did the ghost go to school? To improve his haunting skills.
How do you scare a ghost? You say “Boo-ya!”
What did the ghost say to the comedian? “You slay me!”
Why are ghosts bad at telling lies? Because you can see right through them.
How do ghosts stay fit? They exercise their boo-ty!
Why don’t ghosts make good chefs? They just can’t handle the heat.
What’s a ghost’s favorite room in the house? The living room.
Why was the ghost always invited to parties? He was a scream.
How do ghosts like their drinks? With a little boo-ze.
What did one ghost say to the other? “You’ve got spook-tacular style!”
What’s a ghost’s favorite kind of pie? Boo-berry!

Why did the ghost go to therapy? He had some serious boo issues.
What did the ghost bring to dinner? Boo-tatoes!
Why was the ghost a great friend? He was always lifting spirits.
What’s a ghost’s favorite ice cream flavor? Boo-tter pecan.
Why do ghosts love elevators? They raise their spirits.

Mummy Jokes & Puns You’ll Never Want to Wrap Up

Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid they’ll unwind.
What’s a mummy’s favorite music? Wrap music.
How do mummies send messages? By using their mummy-phones!
Why did the mummy call a doctor? He was coffin too much.
What’s a mummy’s favorite food? Wraps!
Why don’t mummies use social media? They don’t want to reveal all their secrets.
How does a mummy stay in shape? With wrap-a-robics!
Why did the mummy fail his test? He was too wrapped up in his studies.
Why do mummies love Halloween? It’s their time to unwind!
How do mummies make friends? They get wrapped up in their lives.
What’s a mummy’s favorite drink? A wrap-puccino.
What did the mummy say when he won the award? “This is a wrap!”
Why was the mummy’s house so messy? He was too wrapped up to clean.
How do mummies relax? By taking a wrap nap.
What’s a mummy’s favorite holiday? Wrap-mas!
Why was the mummy such a good teacher? He knew how to wrap things up.

Monster Puns That Will Bring Out the Beast in You

Why did the werewolf become a hairdresser? He loved giving howl-overs.
What’s a monster’s favorite party game? Hide and shriek.
How do monsters like their eggs? Terri-fried!
Why did Frankenstein go to school? To work on his shocking grades!
What do you call a monster who loves music? A boogie man!
How do you stop a monster from smelling? Take away its nose.
What did the monster say at the party? “It’s a scream!”
Why did the zombie become a vegetarian? He didn’t have the stomach for meat.
What do monsters call fast food? Franken-bites.
How do monsters communicate? Through scare-mail.
Why did the mummy go to school? To improve his wrap sheet.
Why did the monster break up with his girlfriend? She was driving him batty.
What’s a monster’s favorite dessert? Ice scream!
What do you get when you cross a monster with a snowman? Frostbite.
Why do monsters love Halloween? It’s the best time to get ahead!
What do monsters do on Halloween? They boogie down all night.

Hilarious Bat Puns for a Batty Halloween in 2024

Why don’t bats use smartphones? They prefer to wing it.
What do you call a bat in a belfry? A dingbat!
Why did the bat take a nap? He was feeling a little bat-tered.
What’s a bat’s favorite fruit? A blood-orange.
Why don’t bats need watches? They can always wing it on time.
How do bats relax? They hang out.
Why did the bat go to school? To improve his fly-ability.
What’s a bat’s favorite game? Bat-tleship.
What kind of music do bats listen to? Anything with a lot of bass!
Why did the bat get grounded? He kept hanging out with the wrong crowd.
What’s a bat’s favorite sport? Bat-minton!
How do bats send messages? With eek-mail.
Why don’t bats wear glasses? They’re experts at flying blind.
What do you call a bat who tells jokes? A real comedian-bat.
What’s a bat’s favorite drink? Anything with a lot of bite.
Why did the bat move to the city? He loved the nightlife.

Frightfully Funny Haunted House Jokes & One-Liners

Why don’t haunted houses ever get cleaned? Ghosts can’t handle a broom.
What do ghosts eat for breakfast? Boo-berry pancakes!
Why did the haunted house go to therapy? It had serious abandonment issues.
What’s a haunted house’s favorite song? “I Ain’t Afraid of No Ghosts!”
How do you throw a party in a haunted house? You invite all the spirits.
Why was the haunted house always cold? It had too many chills.
What did the haunted house say to the ghost? “Stop ghosting me!”
Why don’t ghosts use the stairs? They prefer to just float by.
What do haunted houses and pizzas have in common? They’re both scary good!
What’s a haunted house’s favorite board game? Ghostopoly.
How do you keep a haunted house in shape? You give it lots of boos!
Why do ghosts love haunted houses? They’re the best place to hang out.
What did the ghost say when it saw the haunted house? “This place is dead!”
What’s the most popular room in a haunted house? The living room.
Why did the haunted house host a game night? It wanted to raise spirits.
How does a haunted house apologize? With a spirit-ed letter.

Creepy-Crawly Spider Jokes to Spin Your Web of Laughter

Why don’t spiders get lost? They always know the web they’re on.
What’s a spider’s favorite social media? Web-chat!
Why did the spider join the football team? He wanted to tackle the web.
How do spiders get online? They use the worldwide web.
Why don’t spiders need grocery stores? They catch all their meals.
What’s a spider’s favorite breakfast? Web-eggs!
Why do spiders make good secret agents? They’re great at spinning webs of lies.
How do you compliment a spider? Tell it it’s spin-tacular!
What’s a spider’s favorite workout? Spinning!

Also Read: November Jokes & Puns

How do spiders keep their webs so clean? With lots of spin care.
Why did the spider start a business? He wanted to weave his own web of success.
What’s a spider’s favorite snack? Cheese webs.
How does a spider text? It sends a web message.
What did the spider say to the fly? “Welcome to my web.”
Why don’t spiders ever get bored? They’re always spinning something new.
How do spiders keep in touch? They use web-mail!

Witchy & Short Cat Puns to Make Your Halloween Purr-fect

Why did the cat sit on the broomstick? It was feline spooky!
What’s a black cat’s favorite holiday? Hiss-terical Halloween.
Why did the witch’s cat refuse to leave the house? It was a scaredy-cat.
What’s a cat’s favorite Halloween candy? Mice-cream!
Why did the cat join the Halloween party? It was feline festive.
What do witches’ cats love to drink? Witch’s brew-milk.
How do cats celebrate Halloween? With a hiss-terical time!
What do you call a witch’s pet that loves to meow? A purr-fect companion.
What’s a cat’s favorite spell? Abracat-dabra!
How do you make a cat costume spooky? Add some fur-ocious touches.
Why don’t cats like Halloween? Too many hiss-terics!
What’s a witch’s cat’s favorite game? Hide and purr.
How do cats prepare for Halloween? With plenty of claw-some practice.
Why did the witch’s cat miss the party? It was too busy being purr-plexed.
What’s a witch’s favorite cat joke? “You’ve got to be kitten me!”
Why was the black cat so popular at Halloween parties? He was purr-fectly spooky.

Howling Good Werewolf Jokes to Keep You Laughing

Why did the werewolf go to therapy? He had too many howling issues.
What’s a werewolf’s favorite hobby? Howl-ography!
How do you stop a werewolf from chasing you? Throw him a bone!
Why was the werewolf so bad at telling jokes? He always howled at the wrong time.
What’s a werewolf’s favorite drink? Howl-cider!
Why don’t werewolves play cards? They’re afraid of getting wolfed down.
What’s a werewolf’s favorite holiday? Howl-o-ween!
Why did the werewolf join the rock band? He wanted to howl with the crowd.
How do werewolves celebrate Halloween? They have howl-oween parties!
What’s a werewolf’s favorite food? Howl-dogs!
Why don’t skeletons ever lie? They can’t conceal anything!
What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? A trom-bone.
Why did the werewolf break up with his girlfriend? She was too much of a lone wolf.
What do you call a werewolf that writes poetry? A howl-etic!
How does a werewolf start his day? With a howl in the shower.
Why did the werewolf apply for a job? He wanted to earn some extra howl-ers.
What do you call a werewolf who loves to cook? A howl-inary expert.
Why don’t werewolves tell secrets? They always end up howling them out.

Scary Good Horror Movie Puns for Halloween Enthusiasts

Why did the ghost watch horror movies? For the boo-nus scares.
What’s a vampire’s favorite horror movie? “Fangs for the Memories.”
What do you call a haunted library? A ghost read-out.
Why did the zombie watch “The Walking Dead”? To study his lines.
Why don’t skeletons watch horror movies? They’re too afraid to lose their bones.
What’s a ghost’s favorite horror film? “The Frightful Dead.”
How do horror movies end? With a lot of scream time.
Why did the vampire love horror flicks? They always had plenty of blood-sucking scenes.
What do you call a horror movie about candy? “Sweet Tooth’s Revenge.”
Why did the mummy hate horror movies? They gave him unwrap-able nightmares.
What’s the scariest part of a horror movie marathon? The endless popcorn!
Why do zombies hate watching romance movies? They prefer heart-stopping thrillers.
What do ghosts use to stream movies? Boo-tube!
Why don’t werewolves watch horror movies? They howl too loud at the jump scares.
What’s a witch’s favorite horror film? “Hocus Pocus!”
How does a skeleton describe his favorite horror movie? Bone-chilling!

Bone-Chilling Skeleton Jokes That Are Seriously Humerus

Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? He had no body to go with!
What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room? The living room.
Why don’t skeletons fight? They don’t have the guts.
How does a skeleton get around town? On a skel-elevator.
What do skeletons use to cut through objects? A shoulder blade.
Why did the skeleton run a marathon? He wanted to bone up on his fitness.
How do skeletons stay cool? They chill to the bone.
Why was the skeleton always calm? Nothing could rattle him.
How do skeletons greet each other? “Bone-jour!”

What’s a skeleton’s favorite sport? Bad-to-the-bone-minton.
Why don’t skeletons make good secret agents? Because everyone sees right through them.
How do skeletons mail letters? Via the bony express.
What did the skeleton say to his date? “I’ve got a bone to pick with you!”
Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop!

As you prepare to embrace the spooky fun of Halloween, don’t forget that a little humor can make even the most haunted night more memorable. With halloween puns & jokes, you’re fully equipped to bring smiles, laughter, and a few eerie giggles to your Halloween festivities.

Whether you’re sharing these ghostly gags with friends at a party or using them to add a playful twist to your decorations, these puns are sure to lift everyone’s spirits.

Get ready for a frightfully good time as you spread the laughter—and maybe even some chills—this Halloween!